Guilford High School, Guilford, CT, 2007
In our PC world, the old fashioned “wishing that the school would burn down and all the teachers would die” has sadly become something that people get all too worked up about, so it’s nice to see it delivered in such a refreshingly twisted manner. Also, I don’t believe for a second that the signer, who I imagine as Calvin, but in High School, ever realized that it was sort of brilliant that the Raging Cow depicted here was about to be chewing Mr. Cuddy. 
Please keep the awkward yearbook signatures coming!

Guilford High School, Guilford, CT, 2007

In our PC world, the old fashioned “wishing that the school would burn down and all the teachers would die” has sadly become something that people get all too worked up about, so it’s nice to see it delivered in such a refreshingly twisted manner. Also, I don’t believe for a second that the signer, who I imagine as Calvin, but in High School, ever realized that it was sort of brilliant that the Raging Cow depicted here was about to be chewing Mr. Cuddy. 

Please keep the awkward yearbook signatures coming!

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Tags: teacher hatred

Tags: submission

Davis Drive Middle School. Cary, NC 2002
Signing your own yearbook, as Jenn has done here, is an embarrassing, shameful act. In many ways, it’s the pre-internet equivalent of creating a new account on a forum to write posts that agree with your other account.  Except the yearbook one is pretty much a lot crazier.
 
A growing more desperate request: Please submit yearbook signatures!!

Davis Drive Middle School. Cary, NC 2002

Signing your own yearbook, as Jenn has done here, is an embarrassing, shameful act. In many ways, it’s the pre-internet equivalent of creating a new account on a forum to write posts that agree with your other account.  Except the yearbook one is pretty much a lot crazier.

A growing more desperate request: Please submit yearbook signatures!!


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Tags: self signing

Tags: submission

Redwood High School, Larkspur California, 1993
"Tengo un año bueno! Bueno! Bingaww! you are fuct up the Butthole (parental advisory covered) Have a buttbeaming summer with the flaming butt Pirates. 
- Denise “Phunkee Dubes”
Just a few notes about this signature:
1.  One of the six Google results for “Bingaww” is for a blog entry titled “Actually,…I want to rape!!!” which sounds like a hilarious Engrish sentence you might see on a bag of Asian potato chips
2.  ”Phunkee Dubes” is a better rap name than 95% of all real rappers names. I hope that Dubes is Denise’s last name
3.  I’m all too willing to assume Rule 34 on the subject of “Buttbeaming”, but this type of entry makes the plot of last weeks South Park, where a book named “The Poop That Took A Pee” shot up the best seller charts, seem a bit less implausible

A heartfelt request: Please submit yearbook signatures!

Redwood High School, Larkspur California, 1993

"Tengo un año bueno! Bueno! Bingaww! you are fuct up the Butthole (parental advisory covered) Have a buttbeaming summer with the flaming butt Pirates. 

- Denise “Phunkee Dubes”

Just a few notes about this signature:

1.  One of the six Google results for “Bingaww” is for a blog entry titled “Actually,…I want to rape!!!” which sounds like a hilarious Engrish sentence you might see on a bag of Asian potato chips

2.  ”Phunkee Dubes” is a better rap name than 95% of all real rappers names. I hope that Dubes is Denise’s last name

3.  I’m all too willing to assume Rule 34 on the subject of “Buttbeaming”, but this type of entry makes the plot of last weeks South Park, where a book named “The Poop That Took A Pee” shot up the best seller charts, seem a bit less implausible

A heartfelt request: Please submit yearbook signatures!

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Joan MacQueen Middle School, Alpine, CA, 1997
The second half of Katie’s PS is one of the more unintentionally self-aware things I’ve ever seen in a yearbook signature.
Don’t worry about it Katie. It’s cool.  We’re cool. Cool?  Cool.

Joan MacQueen Middle School, Alpine, CA, 1997

The second half of Katie’s PS is one of the more unintentionally self-aware things I’ve ever seen in a yearbook signature.

Don’t worry about it Katie. It’s cool.  We’re cool. Cool?  Cool.

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Tags: dumb

Granite Hills High School, El Cajon, CA, 1999
The transition from sentence one to sentence two of this signature is one of the greatest of all time.  Like a good speech at a roast, it starts with a pleasant formality and then instantly moves on to an incredibly embarrassing anecdote. The later claims of the book owner’s “smartness” are no doubt used ironically, although we should perhaps consider how low of a bar being smarter than Matt, the bottle-stabbing-attempt witness, is.
Efforts to find Cristina’s signature in the yearbook were unsuccessful.

Granite Hills High School, El Cajon, CA, 1999

The transition from sentence one to sentence two of this signature is one of the greatest of all time.  Like a good speech at a roast, it starts with a pleasant formality and then instantly moves on to an incredibly embarrassing anecdote. The later claims of the book owner’s “smartness” are no doubt used ironically, although we should perhaps consider how low of a bar being smarter than Matt, the bottle-stabbing-attempt witness, is.

Efforts to find Cristina’s signature in the yearbook were unsuccessful.

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Tags: outright hostility

Westonka, Minnesota, 1978
Poor Harv.

Westonka, Minnesota, 1978

Poor Harv.

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Tags: outright hostility

Tags: submission

Woodside Middle School, Fort Wayne, IN, 1999
Not a sentence goes unused in this signature.  We start with a name check of a negative pop culture influence.  Then they refer to a teacher in a derogatory manner, before threatening to convince one of their stooges to blow up her house, an act which they are resigned to get caught for, leaving us to wonder why they should even involve Tyler in it in the first place.  It ends with a sign off for the ages, “Pimp ya later!” and a classic signature “Dusty Balls”.  I wonder how you say Dusty Balls in German.

Woodside Middle School, Fort Wayne, IN, 1999

Not a sentence goes unused in this signature.  We start with a name check of a negative pop culture influence.  Then they refer to a teacher in a derogatory manner, before threatening to convince one of their stooges to blow up her house, an act which they are resigned to get caught for, leaving us to wonder why they should even involve Tyler in it in the first place.  It ends with a sign off for the ages, “Pimp ya later!” and a classic signature “Dusty Balls”.  I wonder how you say Dusty Balls in German.


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Tags: teacher hatred

Woodside Middle School, Fort Wayne, IN, 1999
One of these things is not like the other (bottom left). Brad must wonder why “Steve” is so cold to him when he sees him on the golf course. Probably thinks it has something to do with this Jeff character he keeps hearing about.

Woodside Middle School, Fort Wayne, IN, 1999

One of these things is not like the other (bottom left). Brad must wonder why “Steve” is so cold to him when he sees him on the golf course. Probably thinks it has something to do with this Jeff character he keeps hearing about.

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Tags: and you are...?

Thurgood Marshall Middle School, San Diego, CA, 2001
Something tells me Ol’ Bush may not really have a way with words.  If you’re going to copy someone’s entry word for word, you may want to at least do it on a different page.  Or a different part of the page…  Or anywhere but directly underneath the original entry!!
If Bush keeps up this technique throughout his life it could lead to some interesting scenarios. Best Man toasts for example: “Hello everyone.  When my sister asked me to be her maid of honor…”

Thurgood Marshall Middle School, San Diego, CA, 2001

Something tells me Ol’ Bush may not really have a way with words.  If you’re going to copy someone’s entry word for word, you may want to at least do it on a different page.  Or a different part of the page…  Or anywhere but directly underneath the original entry!!

If Bush keeps up this technique throughout his life it could lead to some interesting scenarios. Best Man toasts for example: “Hello everyone.  When my sister asked me to be her maid of honor…”

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Tags: unoriginality

Saline Middle School, MI, 2006
The submitter wished to emphasize that this was NOT an inside joke that a classmate was referencing for old times sake. Well of course it wasn’t!  If you had a grizzled sea captain in your 8th grade class, you probably wouldn’t have had anything to do with him either.

Saline Middle School, MI, 2006

The submitter wished to emphasize that this was NOT an inside joke that a classmate was referencing for old times sake. Well of course it wasn’t!  If you had a grizzled sea captain in your 8th grade class, you probably wouldn’t have had anything to do with him either.

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Tags: wtf